| Summary: | 碩士 === 國立臺北教育大學 === 心理與諮商學系碩士班 === 107 === The study was a self-narrative of the author and her original family. Narrated in the process of losing, seeking and building a sense of home, and analyzed through the lens of Object Relation Theory, the study analyzed the course of morning the loss in the relationship, regaining and reshaping inner good and bad objects, and at last landing mental representation of “home” at a safer place.
The study was based on two topics: A lament over the scattered original family and seeking social identity as offspring of Taiwanese businessman in China and mainlander of third generation. By writing, organizing, reviewing and analyzing, the study carried out an exploration of the author’s original family, a family once existing and representing an ideal life then shattered and disillusioned. The author rebuilt relationship with family members and was enabled to develop “true self” in support of external resources and drive of integration.
As a child of Taiwanese businessman in China and a third-generation mainlander, the author failed to find the sense of belonging on neither side of Taiwan strait. By narration, the author combed through several topics as followed: first, the formation of Taiwanese identity. Second, the development of identity of first and second mainlanders. Sense of loss passed from generation to generation and different ways of growing identity to hometown thus became tangible, and here came the reflection on development of cross strait relationship as well as sense of loss passed on to author’s generation.
As the sense of loss was able to be experienced in real life, repairing experience in infancy then followed. When the author was able to be filled with love by the motivation of integration, new understanding and room for exploration thus were brought into being. Hence, despite of the fact that original family members and the author are now living in different places, reunion in the past and meeting in the future will keep the sense of home renewed and anchored.
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