| Summary: | 碩士 === 國立臺北大學 === 社會工作學系 === 96 === I have been carrying an “original sin“from my childhood with strong inferiority and a great mission. I was deeply attracted by Social Work. I have made believe that Social Work would fulfill me and I could cover up my incapability. Unfortunately, neither can I go back or go forward toward the highest achievement of Social Work. I got lost under the heavy crown of “professional” Social Work.
Although I have had abundant volunteer experiences and Social Work training during my undergraduate and graduate study, I live in an aerial castle which has isolated from the outside sounds and made extrinsic knowledge weak and infirm. In order to keep relations with outside world and consolidate authority, I refuse to talk and listen. Gradually I have found a crack between social work practice and theories. The Self and the Profession have no connection as well. I am lingering in between.
By means of self-narrative, I keep on writing my own story and sharing my texts with classmates in a community college. I start my journey of going home.
The experience of surging interactive dialogue with others also helps me getting close to my parents. By writing down their life stories, I have gained a new insight about them. Experiencing their past histories, I discover the root of my mother’s tenderness and my father’s toughness. New meanings have been revealed by their contexts. In order to get her own space, mom’s voices were suppressed. My father has built a castle for himself and his family by his own effort. With great compassion to them, I yield my condemnation which has hardly been erased from my past.
Afterwards, I discover my own vulnerability. Along, I get close to my own feelings by reviewing my role in my family. I took off the armor called “profession”; I am simply moved by the nature of social work. I rearranged the sequence of my own narrative in the course of positive action. I also get a glimpse on existing discrepancies between the self and the profession in social work academic training.
I walk out the castle; listen to different sounds, and dialogue.
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